The Puebla Ponderosa

The Extent of a Merciful God

2012-02-10T04:30:00.000-05:00

It seems that everywhere I read in the Scriptures, no matter how sinful the people were, God always extended mercy.

Judges 1 and 2 was where I meditated today.

Joshua led the people into the promised land and gave them the orders of the Lord before He died. The Israelites failed to obey. Every single tribe failed to drive out the heathen and idolaters in the land they were given. The cycle continued. The anger of the Lord burned against them; He verbally reproved them; they lifted up their eyes to heaven, wept and sacrificed to their God.

Judges 2:10 "All that generation also were gathered to their fathers; and there arose another generation after them who did not know the Lord, nor yet the work which He had done for Israel."

The baton was not passed. The mandate given to the people in Deuteronomy 6:7-8 was forgotten.

Lord, help me to pass your goodness and the Gospel on to the next generation by my daily interaction with my children. Help me to NOT forget to instruct them. Grant me strength in this task.

So, one would conclude what is stated next; "Then the sons of Israel did evil in the sight of the Lord and served the Baals, and they forsook the Lord their God...."

The cycle: God's anger burned; He gave them over to their enemies; wherever they went the hand of the Lord was against them.

As I read verse 16 of chapter 2, tears began to flow.

"Then the Lord raised up judges who delivered them from the hands of those who plundered them." WHAT??? They don't deserve this Lord.

I don't deserve this.

The mercy God displays to His children is astounding. I need this mercy every day. God's love and covenant with His children is never-ending. His promises to Abraham WOULD be fulfilled. His promises to me, His child, WILL be fulfilled.

I am awestruck by this mercy.

Quote of the Day

2012-02-09T08:26:00.000-05:00

"Surely that man must be in an unhealthy state of soul who can think of all that Jesus suffered, and yet cling to those sins for which that suffering was undergone. It was sin that wove the crown of thorns; it was sin that pierced our Lord's hands and feet and side; it was sin that brought Him to Gethsemane and Calvary, to the cross and to the grave. Cold must be our hearts if we do not hate sin and labour to get rid of it, though we may have to cut off the right hand and pluck out the right eye in doing it."

-J.C. Ryle, quoted by Nancy Leigh DeMoss, Holiness

We are all a Prodigal at One Time or Another

2012-02-08T08:41:00.000-05:00

Facing day to day the reality of what has happened to our family makes me examine my relationship with my spiritual Daddy. I am rebellious and love the world more than Him way too often. This song is for me as well as my Hoss.

Only Her!

2012-02-01T16:37:00.002-05:00

The past couple of days I have thought about my mom quite a bit.

I miss her so much. There are days when I can hear her voice still. Days when I am singing that I hear her song ring out. Days I look in the mirror and she is looking back at me. (The older I get, the more this happens.)

I was and still am blessed to have had a mom who cared for me in the way she did. She had a way of getting things done. No obstacle in her way. (The Walmart managers can attest to this)

She was full of life.

But, lately, I have been mulling over her death. I know. Not somewhere I should be hanging out at too long. And yet, there was such beauty and peace through the last couple of weeks in her life. I was so thankful to have been there to care for her. I can still smell her hair. Many times a day I would comb it as it would help her to relax. There are times I can't believe she is gone. This week has been just one of those times. Wishing I could pick up the phone and tell her that I'm quitting this thing called "mommyhood".

Tell her that I can't do this another day.
Tell her that I am so frustrated at teaching my children.
Tell her that I just want my boy home.
Tell her that I love her.

Then I would hear her say, "You can do it." I would hear her laugh that infectious laugh and tell me what a great job I am doing. Only she can say it the way she did.

The most beautiful thing about her death was the presence of the Lord during those days. He was there with us. He gave us the grace to face death...of her body. But we have complete assurance that she is alive and well. Christ beat death. He gives us life.

I mull on this some more.

This Momma Loves Her Boy

2012-01-28T04:00:00.000-05:00

Today is another special day. My biggest's Happy Gotcha Day. It seems like we just celebrated it. Time is going too fast. And he is away from home. This makes the heart sad. Every year, we celebrate these special days with each of the children. We write them a letter each year to remind them of God's special plan for their lives. This year "Hoss" is not here to celebrate. I'm not sure he would want to. So I pray and write to my Father in heaven instead.

My Jesus,

You started a work in "Hoss'" life 15 years ago today. You placed him in my arms. Sitting at the Tampa International Airport my arms became full; my heart became fuller. His sweet little face shone up at me. I knew You were in the midst of this.

This. This has become so hard. So difficult. Yet, I believe You are still in this. Though my boy is so much bigger now, he still can fit in this heart of mine. You answered a prayer when I asked for a child. You gave me three more.

God, I know that I have asked you so many times to do the seemingly impossible. I believe You are answering. In Your time. In Your way. I know you love this boy more than I do. I know you promise to work all things out for our good; for I love you and am called according to Your purpose.

Purpose? I have asked, "What is the purpose of this?" You patiently bring be back to Your Word and remind me of Your purposes.

So I thank You. On my knees. Full of tears. Open heart.

Knock. Knock. Knock.

Book Review - Then Sings My Soul

2012-01-26T20:45:00.000-05:00

Off all the books, I have read to review here on the Ponderosa, this is, by far, my favorite.

Robert Morgan has brought the beauty of the old hymns to the heart of the modern believer. Then Sings My Soul is an amazing journey through the past 200 years of hymn writing; therefore, of the lives of saints of old. Contemporary Christian music has hit an all time high in revenues and availability, but an all time low in content.

In the spirit of being modern, we forget the importance of these old beloved hymns. What's even greater in the writings of Mr. Morgan is his ability to help us jump on the pages of time and get to know the authors of these beauties.

Not only do we learn about the lives of those who penned these hymns, but the author takes the time to educate us on the eras of hymns from the ancient Biblical times to now. Most believers now a days have no understanding of these facts.

As a home school mom, this book will become a permanent part of my curriculum. I cannot neglect to teach my children the history behind these beautiful songs.

As a part of the Booksneeze Blogging Network, I received a complimentary copy of this book.

Two Special Christmas Gifts

2012-01-21T15:49:00.000-05:00

I have tried to make each of my children a crosstitch pillow. Here are the two I made for my girls this year for Christmas. Thanks to my Dad's wife, Lindi, for sewing the pillows. And as a special gift she made matching nightgowns for each of their American Girl dolls.

It's NOT your right!

2012-01-19T08:25:00.000-05:00

The American way..."It's my right!"

God's way....1 Corinthians 8:9-13
"But take care that this right of yours does not somehow become a stumbling block to the weak. For if anyone sees you have knowledge eating in an idol's temple, he will not be encouraged, if his conscience is weak, to eat food offered to idols? And so by your knowledge this weak person is destroyed, the brother for whom Christ died. Thus, sinning against your brothers, and wounding their conscience when it is weak, you sin against Christ. Therefore, if food makes my brother stumble, I will never eat meat, lest I make my brother stumble."

Food, drink, modesty, television show, movies, any form of entertainment, money, etc.

These are all things fellow believers' consciences differ in. And we must take the high road to encourage our neighbor, not bring down.

So often, we are so self-focused that we are blinded to the fact, our sin is not against our brother, but against Christ who paid our ransom. When we cause a fellow brother to stumble, we are seeing our liberty as more important than their growth.
Self-centeredness.
Plain and simple.

I find it interesting that the Apostle Paul did not say, "If food makes my brother stumble, I will abstain until he has matured." What he does say is, "I will NEVER eat meat."

Putting our brothers and sisters ahead of our own desires and loving them more important than ourselves.

After all, this was Christ's attitude as He laid down His own life for us.

Through the Eyes of a Special Five Year Old

2012-01-16T08:18:00.001-05:00

Sundays are always a great time for friends and fellowship after church. I grew up with hospitality always being shown on Sundays. So, yesterday we had some friends over to catch up. Their five year old is my littlest's best friend.

There are so many times children speak profoundly when not even knowing it. Yesterday was one of those times.

As I was tying this little one's shoe, he noticed I had two pictures up on my wall that are remarkably similar. Curiously, I probed his little mind to see if he would notice the differences. So, I asked him what he saw that was different.

"The bowls are different colors."

I asked again...and again...and again.

"The Bibles are different colors."
"The bread looks different."
"The bowls are not the same."
"The man's shirt is a different color."
"Their beard's are different."

The only left to do was hug this precious boy who is being raised color blind.

If only the world viewed men through these lenses.

Thank you, little Will, for your precious heart.

Complete Surrender

2012-01-11T04:00:00.000-05:00

As I am reading through Surrender, by Nancy Leigh DeMoss, I am struck by the fact that my heart fights against this.

I am prone to anxiety. I am, at times, racked with worry. I have not surrendered my son completely.

I must.

Nancy quotes a poem by Ann Blocher before she went home to be with the Lord. She fought the battle with cancer, and in the midst of this, wrote these beautiful words:

Yes, Lord! Yes and Amen!

"Can you trust Me, child?

Not only for ultimate eternity,

of which you know next to nothing,

and so are not tempted to meddle-

But for the little span of your life between

the Now and Then, where your envision

decline and separations and failures,

impairments, pain, bereavements, disappointments-

Do you find Me qualified to Lord of your last days?

Oh-yes, Lord! YES, Lord! Yes and amen!

Can you trust Me, child?

Not only to synchronize the unthinkable

intricacies of creation-

But to work together for the good the gravities

and tugs within your little orbit,

where your heart is pulled by needs

and lacks you wish, but are destitute, to fill-

Do you find My resources adequate

to feed both the sparrow and you?

Oh-yes, Lord! YES, Lord! Yes and amen!

Can you trust Me, child?

Not only for the oversight of nations

and creations not of this world-

But for those beloved ones I committed

to you and you committed to Me-

Do you believe Me trustworthy to perform

the good work begun in them

until the Day of Jesus Christ?

Oh- yes, Lord! YES, Lord! Yes and amen!"

-pg. 204-205, Surrender by Nancy Leigh DeMoss

Another One For Those Needing Freedom...Namely My Hoss

2012-01-10T07:39:00.000-05:00

Book Review - The Search Committee

2012-01-09T13:11:00.003-05:00

The Search Committee, written by Tim Owens, is a unique read. You, sort of, feel as if you are in a soap opera or reality show. The read is easy as you follow the lives of those serving on a pastor search committee for a church. It shows the humanity of man as a group of people, male and female, from every sect of life. Each person struggles in some way as they strive to work together for the common purpose of finding a shepherd for the church they are part of.

Though this book seems shallow somewhat at first read, but you really become engaged as you get to know the various people involved. And you feel for them, too.

I think the grand premise I took away from this book is that all people, no matter their position, are human and struggle with life as we all do. Unfortunately, even in the realm of church and ministry, people fail. Ultimately, that is why we keep our eyes on God instead of man.

The only negative is that I would have liked to read more about the true answer to people's problems, namely, Jesus Christ. True change comes from above.

I received a free copy from the Tyndale Blogging Network.

When the Night Comes

2012-01-06T08:26:00.001-05:00

Darkness is an amazing thing. The Bible has so much to say contrasting light and darkness. Darkness is so often viewed with evil, sin, and deceit. After all, so many crimes happen in the dead of night, not the light of day.

Jesus is the Light of the World. We are to be reflective of THE light and to shine forth our lights. We are to be cities set on hills that cannot be hidden. We are commanded to not put our lights under a bushel. Our Lord is the lamp to our path and a light to our feet. Light dispels all darkness.

When the night comes and darkness sets in, I sometimes feel as if I can't even control my thoughts. Things that I know are not real, become real. Anxiety is strong. Fear takes a foothold.

So, I can relate to the Psalmist as he cries unto Jehovah:

"When I remember You upon my bed, and meditate on You in the watches of the night, for You have been my help and in the shadow of Your wings I sing for joy." Psalm 63:6-7

This is my plea as we go through this unknown time with our beloved oldest son. The future is uncertain. We don't know where the finances will come from to keep him in a safe place until he is ready to come home. This is fear. Deep in my gut.

But then, I remember. Peace floods in. Fear tries to creep back and I must push it away. And remember.

So tonight, I will not let my thoughts linger. I will not allow my mind to bring pain to my inner parts. I will remember the faithfulness of God.

Our Heart is Filled With Thankfulness

2012-01-02T13:09:00.002-05:00

We are home.

And full of so many emotions.

After a long 8 months of not seeing our oldest, we were able to see "Hoss".

It was a good feeling putting my arms around him. There was lots of conversation and restoration. We praise God for this.

God still must work and we are trusting Him to accomplish this. We are on our knees daily surrendering our son to Him. Salvation is of the Lord! We pray for this.

One word to sum up this visit was realness...if that is a word. "Hoss" came out and was honest and truthful about all that has happened and the games that were played in the past. Though we wanted to hear that God has saved him and changed him, we are thankful that he was honest. We would must rather have a great relationship with an unsaved son, than have a mediocre relationship with a Pharisee.

So, friends, we ask for your prayers regarding the following:

1. Salvation to "Hoss"; surrender from him.
2. When April arrives we have some decisions regarding financial and placement.
3. The many emotions for the rest of us, especially the children. They all miss him and struggle with coming back from seeing him.
4. God to continue to work in our lives to conform us to His image through this trial.

Off We Go!

2011-12-22T05:00:00.000-05:00

We just left for a 10 road trip.

May your celebration of the Incarnation bring much joy and delightful memories.

Praise God for that little baby!

Merry Christmas!

Birthday Wishes for a Special Young Man

2011-12-21T03:30:00.000-05:00

He is 15 today.

I've dreamed of this day. Always thought I'd be with him, but life happens. Thankfully God is the guardian and guide of this life.

Dear "Hoss",
Another year has passed and we find ourselves apart again. I have so many memories, son, of such good times. Of love, affection and your little arms around my neck. I am so thankful for these memories. But you certainly are growing up. The struggles you have as a 15 year old, 6'1", ***lbs young man are struggles others have gone through. So many others. Dad and I continue to hear those stories. But we are confident God is using these hard times to mold you and grow you to be used in a mighty way for Him in the future. The last 3 years have been so hard, but in comparison to eternity they are a drop in the bucket.

Our prayer for you is complete surrender to your Heavenly Father who loves you with an everlasting love. He has plucked you out and called you by name. He has given you to us as a "Cartwright" for a very specific reason. I am trusting you will come to know this reason and place full faith in your Creator.

We leave in the morning to see you. A Christmas we are bound to never forget. New traditions of the Advent. Just so thankful for be able to put my arms around you. Eight months seems like an eternity.

We love you so much, "Hoss".

And I know deep down inside you know this.

The Unexpected...But How We Should Expect.

2011-12-20T03:30:00.000-05:00

What do you do when you get a phone call from a car rental dealership saying, "Mrs. 'Cartwright', you have a secret Santa that has paid for you to have a mini van for your upcoming trip to Missouri?" knowing you plan to drive your 13 year old van on a 3,000 mile trip? The same van that makes noises from unknown places?

You say, "God is amazing, always faithful!"

We, here on the Ponderosa, we keep a journal called, "God's faithfulness to the "Cartwrights". It has just gotten longer. My God never ceases to amaze me. Just last night my hubby and I were crying and praying in bed, asking for God's forgiveness for not really believing He can do the impossible.

Our Master can do it. He shows His love and mercy in such tangible ways. He cares for His children and dazzles us so often with His grace.

Santa did not do this, but one of our God's children did.

Praise God from Whom all blessings flow!

Lord, continue to help our unbelief.

Book Review - Nearing Home

2011-12-19T09:38:00.000-05:00

Billy Graham is an American household name. Many people have come to Christ in the ministry God has given him. One of the most influential books he has written is his new book, Nearing Home.

Very well written, Graham gives those in any age, but specifically older saints, courage as he practically lays out how to live well to the end. Most importantly, the pages are filled with Scripture to encourage those who are discouraged. For as one ages, the pains are stronger and the body fails. But God is the source of strength.

Practically speaking, he delves into preparing financially so as not to burden those left behind, as well as encouraging those who are aged to NOT retire. To keep busy ministering to the Lord and the world. This is so contrary to what the world deems as your right for all the hard work you've done previously. Most importantly he encourages the reader to keep going to the end...and finish well, keeping one's eye on the prize of heaven.

Truly it is not how one starts life, but how one finishes.

As I read this book, I found myself desiring old age. I know, this sounds a little silly. But Billy Graham has an amazing perspective. One that I saw in my own mom as a fatal sickness took her. Even though she didn't have a chance to live into older years, she finished well.

Thank you, Mr. Billy Graham for giving us the best you ever have.

I received a free copy of this book, as part of Booksneeze blogging network.

My Heart's Cry...

2011-12-10T03:30:00.000-05:00

for my son.

.

Slow and Steady

2011-12-09T03:30:00.000-05:00

We have had several "friends" stop in for pit stops...

We have enjoyed their presence and then, quickly cleaned up their slime trails.

My littlest has added a dimension to the Ponderosa that has NEVER existed before. I have always had my thoughts about people who had ten million animals in their home. Friends, please remind me of these thoughts periodically.

"Inger" may win in the end.

Miscellaneous Advent Items

2011-12-08T10:26:00.001-05:00

Our special friend, Patty, came over this week. She was one of my Mom's closest friends. It is such a blessing to have her in my children's lives. In fact, she may become Grandma Patty soon. So, she walks in the door this last Tuesday and has these in her hand. A special memory invaded my mind.

Baking with mom.

One thing I miss so much this time of year. I can still hear mom's beautiful voice singing her Christmas songs. Especially Bing Crosby.

And, yes, they have already disappeared.

Thank you, dear friend.

"Little Joe" is spending the day with a friend so today the girls and I baked our first round of cookies. We made Eskimo snowballs, healthy buckaroos, and oatmeal butterscotch bars. They all look delicious. And I must say they did a fantastic job. There were many teachable moments as well. Much said about loving our neighbor as ourselves and preferring each other in love.

Now, one of our favorite movies, Holiday Inn, is playing and our crosstitch is out and our hands are busy.

Just love these times when formal school can take a backseat and life can happen.

His Righteousness Not Mine

2011-12-02T08:46:00.001-05:00

As my study continues through the book of Romans I stand in awe. (John Piper's sermons are guiding me.)

I was born bad because my heart is bad. I have nothing to offer Christ in and of myself. But He has offered me His righteousness which is the only means to having a relationship with my Savior.

He drew me at a young age. At 4 years old I prayed to receive Christ into my life. I knew not what this life consisted of. I knew not the challenges I would face. But I knew that Jesus died for my sins and I wanted to surrender my little life to Him. As the years came and went, my understanding grew. And still does. Each year I gain more heart knowledge of what this journey is about. And I gain more faith in putting my all in His hands.

But without the righteousness imputed to me, I would have no hope. It was forgiveness and Christ's death on the cross that sets one free from sin, but without Christ giving me His righteousness, I am lost and dead without hope. When God looks at me, He sees His Son's perfect life. Not my pitiful, measly works.

This is transforming. This is salvation. This salvation is the Gospel. This Gospel is what saves me. And will keep me.

Romans 1:16-18
"For I am not ashamed of the Gospel; for it is the power of God for salvation to everyone who believes, to the Jew first and also to the Greek. For in it the righteousness of God is revealed from faith to faith, as it is written, 'the just shall live my faith'. For the wrath of God is revealed from heaven against all ungodliness and unrighteousness of men, who by their unrighteousness, suppress the truth."

God's love was the force of sending His Son. But His Son's righteousness is the means of salvation.

Book Review -The Grace Effect

2011-12-01T07:59:00.001-05:00

Five Stars.

That's what I'd give The Grace Effect by Larry Alex Taunton. This is a great read that takes you down the Taunton family's journey to adoption from Ukraine. But it is not your normal adoption story. The author unravels grace as seen in a whole new way. His experience in a country that has denounced the Christian faith in any form except religiosity drove him to see grace in a whole new way.

As the family journeyed to the Ukraine to adopt their darling daughter, Sasha, must was learned of the history of Russia. Mr. Taunton gives brief history lessons in his book while documenting the atrocities that go on in governments that WILL not acknowledge God. God without grace is laws, rules and evil. It is works based.

As you read this book you will become keenly aware of the many blessings America still has, (though I don't know for how long), because there was a foundation based on Judeo-Christian beliefs.

Russia is full of bribery, embezzlement and deceit, all in the name of getting ahead. The orphan, widow and mentally or physically challenged are thrown to the side, if not abused.

Grace does an amazing thing in one's life. God's grace does even more.

As a part of the Booksneeze blogging network, I received a free copy of this book.

Delight...In the Mailbox

2011-11-30T04:30:00.000-05:00

We haven't seen him in almost 8 months.

This came in the mail this weekend. His 9th grade pictures.

Oh, how we miss him.

Twenty-four more days....

A Special Friend, A Special Ministry

2011-11-29T04:30:00.000-05:00

This last weekend we finished up a holiday tradition that became part of the Ponderosa a couple of years ago.

We have a special friend, Laurie Borland, who lost her dear husband, Tim, this last June. Together they have ministered in the prison system teaching Inductive Bible Study to the men who find themselves behind bars...some of them for a very long time. They have been in ministry for 15 years or so with Jesus Only Way Ministry. Since Tim's homegoing, there has been a special man who has taken over the teaching portion of the ministry. We pray for God's direction for our dear sister and friend.

Each Christmas there is a care package put together to give to the men who attend the Bible Studies. We send a Christmas card, with 10 blank note cards and 10 stamps. Things like this we take for granted, but the truth is this is a luxury for many of the people who are incarcerated. Ministries like Jesus Only Way not only make this possible, but also are giving the Bread of Life to many who are very hungry and malnourished. We thank the Lord for those who are sent to the "least of these" and ask God's blessing on them. Missions is taking place in places both far and near.

A Special Adoption Day

2011-11-28T05:30:00.000-05:00

Our dear "Marie",

Today we celebrate your 11th adoption day. We can't forget the day we met you at Micky D'S. Your sweet little face was expressionless; almost as if you were depressed. Your little life had already experienced way more than it should have. Within weeks there was a light in your eyes that hadn't been there before.

Your grew in leaps and bounds, but in the past ten years you have grown in an area that is the most important. Your walk with God.

God has does a gracious work in your heart. You have such a close relationship with Him and I stand in awe at what He is doing. Though God created you with all sorts of struggles and delays in what the world would deem as needful, you have proven to us that God can do abundantly above all that we ask or think.

Our prayer to you, dear daughter, is that your relationship with your Savior will continue to be the most important thing in your life. That you would strive to love Him and continue to have a soft heart for the things of the Lord. Keep seeking Him. Keep asking for His will to be done. Keep living for Him.

"Marie", you sure do amaze us. We love you and are so grateful to the gift that God gave us so long ago.

Happy 17th!

2011-11-26T04:30:00.000-05:00

On this day, 17 years ago I married my best friend, lover and confidant. We've been through all sorts of trials and struggles, but love and thankfulness wells up in my heart.

"Mr. Cartwright", You are the love of my life. I am blessed to be your wife. I am eternally grateful to the Lord for bringing us together. The years go by; the love gets sweeter.

Thanks for putting up with me and thinking of me more important than yourself. Thank you for loving me despite my selfish heart and whining so often about wanting my way.

We have made some amazing memories.

I am thankful to have you by my side as we do this thing called "life" together. You are mine forever.

Hearts of Thankfulness

2011-11-24T04:30:00.000-05:00

Happy Thanksgiving from the Puebla Ponderosa!

Movie Review - Journey to Christmas

2011-11-21T08:55:00.001-05:00

As our family used the last couple of evenings to view the DVD, Journey to Christmas, we had lots to reflect on afterward.

Everyone likes a reality show format. It's engaging and keeps you wanting more information about the people that are part of it.

Journey to Christmas takes you on a journey with 5 adults, all from different background, places and ages. They are given a tour of Israel from the point of view of the Christmas story. There are 4 episodes, and in each one there is one focal point of the Nativity story.

The "journey" is very well done, as far as a film goes. As a spectator, we learned a lot of the history of Israel and the culture surrounding Jesus' life on earth. We were able to really appreciate the terrain and ruggedness of life in the area where our Savior grew up. Each person who traveled in this movie had a different view on religion and their lives. Two of the women seemed to be the most grounded in what true salvation is.

The disappointing part of this movie was the ability to see what the world has done to the sacred place of Christ's life. In the words of one of the gentlemen, "This is religious c**p. God is not impressed with all this." Our sentiments exactly. The world has made a shrine of idolatry to God and what He wants most is their lives surrendered to Him. There wasn't much change in any of the travelers. Those who believed still believed and those who did not, still did not. We also would have desired to see more of heart changing opportunities, rather than just a historical synopsis of Israel.

We, as a family connected with Drew the most. He was adopted and left his home at 16 years old due to "issues". We have these "issues" in our lives most days. He was the most down to earth and real, no-nonsense traveler. We pray that God would work past all these human means to save these people for His glory.

The reason for Christ's birth was overlooked. He came because we need salvation from our sins. This is the true meaning of Christmas.

*As a part of the Tyndale Blogging Network, I received a complementary copy of this DVD.

Her First "love letter"

2011-11-20T05:30:00.000-05:00

Our beautiful little "Inger" has written her first letter to her big bro...who is so far away. Precious.

Roses are Red....When They are Pruned

2011-11-19T13:15:00.001-05:00

My rose bushes seemed to have stopped growing and producing beautiful roses. They are still green but just stagnant. No new growth and the leaves are slowly getting spots. Just not looking too healthy.

Like us, sometimes.

We are still breathing and alive, yet stagnant in any growth.

I grabbed my pruners and chopped away...1, 2, 3.

So does HE.

The gracious, wise Gardener takes His shears and cuts. He knows when we are looking puny. Sure, our roots are still alive, but we sure aren't bearing much fruit, so He cuts. And trims. And sends trials our way that take away the dying leaves and allows for much needed growth. Growth that would NOT come were it not for the pruning.

I looked at my three rather, sorry-looking bushes today. There's hope. There's new leaves. They're beautiful and green.

I'm becoming more thankful for the Master Gardener. He knows what's best.

Trust, soul, trust.

John 15:1,2 (ESV)
"I am the True Vine and my Father is the Vinedresser. Every brand in me that does not bear fruit he takes away, and every brand that does bear fruit He prunes, that it may bear more fruit."

Away From Home

2011-11-15T16:48:00.001-05:00

So we're told, "He knows why he's here."

We do too.

And yet, we wish He were here.

Home. A safe place where love is lavished on all who reside.
Home. A secure place where each member knows about Our Great God.
Home. Two parents who strive to live each day loving each other and the Lord.
Home. Home. Home.

I often wonder when he will be able to say, "I'm glad I'm home. This is my home. I'm thankful for my home."

I wish I could read his mind and make him believe. But I can't!

So I keep on knocking. My knuckles hurt. So I put on my boxing gloves and fight as I knock.

Fight against self and my wants.
Fight with the Word against the powers of the world and darkness.
Fight for our Son, which he will be forever.

Amazing....

2011-11-13T05:30:00.000-05:00

So how many Bibles do you own?

How many are sitting on your shelves?

Rethink the importance...

We, Not He and I

2011-11-12T06:30:00.000-05:00

Thank you to my friend for sending this my way. I had not yet heard this song. As I listened and read the lyrics, my prayer is that the "we" will include my "Hoss" . It has been a long road, but what I have come to realize is that God's plan is not mine. The road we travel seems so deep at times.

And lonely.

And sad.

And full of bruises and skinned knees.

But our God is so much more concerned with our Spiritual walk than our physical needs. And, boy, does He know how much Mr. Cartwright and I need to continue to be conformed to His image.

Yesterday I heard this quote from Paul Pennington, "Adoption is not about meeting your own needs. It is about being conformed to the image of Christ." I must remember this.

Book Review - Invasion

2011-11-11T09:45:00.001-05:00

I'm always looking for good books for my children.

That was my focus on reading and reviewing Invasion by Jon S. Lewis.It is difficult to find books, especially for boys, that will be adventurous, but not full of language, vampires, or anything that would hinder their spiritual walk.

Invasion could be labeled as a sci-fi book. There was lots of adventure and fast paced movement. The story line follows a young man who is part of a family of CHAOS special agents. Little does he know when his father drops him off for "college days" at the local agency, his life is changed forever.

Jon Lewis does a great job at drawing the reader into the story and once you get sucked in, it is very difficult to retreat. This is not a book I would normally pick out to read for myself, but I am very happy with a good book, that I can trust to put into the hands of my sons.

The only drawback I see is the introduction of aliens. There is so much focus in the world today on life on other planets. People are sucked into this falsehood and it can take away from the story of Beginnings in the Bible. But as long as you and your children are aware of true Biblical life, this shouldn't be a problem.

As part of the Thomas Nelson Blogging Network, I received a complementary copy of this book.

A Sudden Encouragement

2011-11-10T15:02:00.001-05:00

This has encouraged me greatly today. There are times you know God sends things your way, knowing you need help and mercy. This is one of those times.

Hymn Study - Robert Robinson

2011-11-07T08:22:00.000-05:00

Our hymn study for this week is Come Thou Fount of Every Blessing by Robert Robinson. As you watch this short film on his life, praise God with me for the amazing grace He bestows on man. Of course, my thoughts turn to my "Hoss". God can do the miracle in his life too.

This is my favorite rendition.

Beautiful!

2011-11-05T19:35:00.002-04:00

Shai Linne has done it again. His new album "The Attributes of God" is his best yet.

Sola Deo Gloria!

Wrestling Camp

2011-11-03T15:29:00.001-04:00

My big boy is involved in wrestling camp this week at Agape.

We miss him more than words can say.

Book Review: Wait No More

2011-10-31T19:22:00.000-04:00

An amazing read.

I am an adoptive mother of 4 who is dealing with the issues that come along the way. Issues that no one warned us of. I was a little leery of reading another book on some one's adoption story. But John and Kelly Rosati do an amazing job of keeping it real. An adoption story that could be any one's. The good and the bad. This part of the story is so important.

As I read their story, I could have easily put myself in there shoes. I felt like I was reading my story and more importantly, my children's stories. The Rosati's story is one of fear, anxiety, but more importantly, trust. Trust in the God. The only One to help do His will. Adoption is a roller coaster ride. We know. And I thank the Rosatis for being real. Making this story truth of the journey.

Adoption is so important for the body of Christ to be involved in, but truth needs to be told. The journey is difficult. But this is how the body of Christ loves the fatherless and orphan. We don't just stop because it is hard.

This is one of my favorite adoption stories.

Thanks again, John and Kelly.

As part of the Tyndale Blogging Network, I received a complimentary copy of this book.

A Glimpse

2011-10-31T06:39:00.001-04:00

Here he is....

Football Camp.

Agape Boarding School.

It's been a long 7 months without seeing him.

Identity

2011-10-28T04:30:00.000-04:00

There will soon be 3 young people (teens) in my house. Well, one is not here physically. But he is constantly part of my life.

And with 3 young adults comes all kinds of new conversations.

Conversations here at the Ponderosa are not always typical of other homes. That's what happens when you have many different backgrounds and ethnicity. When the kids were younger there was no thought to their skin color, but as they age it comes to the surface.

Sure, all teens go through some sort of, "Who am I?" "What do I believe?" and I think at times even, "What does the culture say to me about who I am?"

For those of us in white skin, I don't think we understand the full extent of the world around us. Think about it. When my children are involved in other activities outside of the Ponderosa, they are in a sea of white. If the tables were turned, not many of us would last too long without being uncomfortable. You can't deny it. I don't want to admit it, but you know it's true.

This was one of the major issues in "Hoss"' life when everything went down.

This is creeping up in "Little Joe's" life too.

As our family grew we never made a big deal about race. But as they grow, it comes up. And we have to have answers. I know the God who has THE answer.

As I was listening to John Piper's message on Romans 1:1 he said something that was so profound.

"The question is not Who are you?, but rather, Whose are you?."

This is the key. And as I share this and pray this for my little bigs, I look for avenues for more integration too. I have lovely friends who add more color to our lives, and for this I am grateful.

I know we'll make it.

Resting

2011-10-27T15:31:00.000-04:00

The burden, at times, can be so heavy. The weight of the world all wrapped up in 4 little big people. I know I am not in control of their future, even though so many times I pretend to be. I want to be just for today. If I can guarantee MY outcome.

But I know the Lord asks me to do this:

"Come to Me, all you who are weary and burdened and I will give you rest. Take My yoke upon you and learn from Me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For My yoke is easy and My burden is light." (Mt. 11:28-30)

So daily I surrender them to their Maker. Their emotions, attitudes and choices. Even when rebellion sets in, I can know without a shadow of a doubt that my Lord is in control.

He gave them as gifts to me. He placed them into our home. He knew the events that would take place in the years following their cute little arrival.

So I find myself on my knees.

And that is a good place.

Fun at Wycliffe Bible Translators

2011-10-22T05:00:00.000-04:00

Wednesday, the girls, along with my nieces, attended Wycliffe Bible Translators children's program, A to Z. The leaders and workers were so good with the kids. They said so many life altering things that our children need to hear more often, like, "Be grateful for school. There are many children who cannot even attend school and learn now to read."

We studied the country of Ethiopia. There are 94 languages in Ethiopia, with a little more than 50 that still need a translation of the Bible.

While practicing with the musical instruments, we were told a story. Years ago there was a 12 year old girl who attended a class. She was given a people group to pray for. She diligently prayed through the years. Time came for her to graduate. She majored in translation work and was accepted to Wycliffe to be a translator. They assigned her a people group...and guess what people group this was? Right! The one she had prayed for as a youth. God used her to answer her own prayers. Amazing.

We are spoiled. Bible sit upon shelves in most houses without much use. We take for granted those who gave their lives for the printing and translation work hundreds of years ago. We are blessed.

It All Adds Up

2011-10-21T10:39:00.000-04:00

Tribulations.
Perseverance.
Proven Character.
Hope.
Romans 5:2-5 remind me that these ~~burdens~~ essential tasks to the believer working out their salvation with fear and trembling will be evident in those who hope in God.

Not only that, but I, as a child of God, will exult in them.

Wow!

And Why?

Because the love of God has been poured out within my heart through the Holy Spirit given to me. (V.5; with personalization)

I am rich. I am loved. I must persevere.

Attention Issues?????

2011-10-17T15:37:00.002-04:00

My littlest treasure is in kindergarten this year so we are doing more formal school than last. Lately it has sounded something like this:

Mommy: Let's sound out this word. (I point to each letter as we blend)
Inger: r...a...rat
I HAVE A RAT MOMMY. LET ME GO GET IT!
Not right now.

Mommy: Next word. Look here at this word I am pointing to.
Inger: s..o...sock
CAN I GO GET A PAIR OF SOCKS? MY FEET ARE COLD.
Not right now.

Mommy: Come on. Let's look at the next word.
Inger: r..o..rock
I SAW A ROCK YESTERDAY AT CHURCH. YOU SHOULD HAVE SEEN IT MOMMY!

Mommy: Please concentrate, little one. (Not I'm tapping my finger to the first letter of the next word.)
Inger: up
Mommy: Great job. You didn't even have to sound it out.
At this point she hops up on the chair and jumps up and down. MY BALLOON GOES UP, MOMMY!

I am exhausted. Really, this was word for word my teaching experience today and most days. Believe it or not, we do very little book work. My Father's World is a great curriculum!

Patience. That is what I am developing.

But I am definitely going to buy this soon.

Book Review - Pershing

2011-10-15T12:29:00.000-04:00

I am not a student of war history, but I fully enjoyed learning more about historical conflicts of 1850 to 1945 by reading Pershing, by John Perry.

John J. Pershing was an amazing soldier, who became the youngest brigadier general in history. He attended West Point and soon after moved out west to help with the Native American conflict. Unlike most military men, he was able to bring peace to the area by befriending the natives and using very wise non-violent conflict resolution. He also was a commander over the Buffalo Soldiers. He served in the Philippines, as well as being involved in the Cuba conflict in the late 1800's. He fought in France during World War II.

He was a "typical" military man when it came to his personal life. That is until he met his wife, Helen Francis Warren, daughter of a Senator Warren. As I read this book, I was thankful to John Perry for including so much of his personal life. For this is what dictates who a man really is. He and "Frankie" had 4 children. After a tragedy that took the lives of his love and his daughters, he became liberal in his private life. Many women were involved in his life. Rendezvous, if you will.

This book has been written as a great biography of a "great" man, yet, with little morals and nothing spiritually to speak of, unless you see baptism into a church as religious. His life definitely did not depict someone of great faith. Yet, you can see God's sovereignty in using him to further America and its military.

As a part of the Booksneeze bloggers network, I received a complementary copy of this book.

Thankfulness

2011-10-15T05:00:00.000-04:00

1. My hardworking hubby. Grateful he has a job.

2. Cooler temps today. Yeah! The cold front made it...finally.

3. Nancy Leigh DeMoss and the truths she speaks into my life via Revive our Hearts.

4. Good friends...especially those who care about your spiritual growth.

5. Romans. Nothing more said is needed.

6. My beautiful children...and the one who is not here right now. He is missed. Thankful for telephones too.

7. A special, encouraging email from my Dad.

8. Freedom

9. The gift of forgiveness to and from.

10. Wisdom from above that comes from my Heavenly Father.

11. My extended family. We love each other and fight FOR each other.

Unmatched Kindness

2011-10-14T05:00:00.000-04:00

I find myself so prone to judging others. As I am reading through, Brokenness, by Nancy Leigh DeMoss, I am realizing the reason for this attitude.

Pride. Plain and simple. It is a nasty snare that can so subtly creep up and entangle my heart.

Along side this book I am studying the book of Romans and wouldn't you just know it? They go hand in hand. As I read through Romans chapter 1 yesterday, much of it was a reminder of things I've already heard. Man has no excuse to reject God; for God has written His law on each man's heart as well as creation shouting out His majesty. Then I came to verse 28.

"And just as they did not see fit to acknowledge God any longer, God gave them over to a depraved mind, to do those things which are not proper."

I thought, "In order to NOT acknowledge God, they had to acknowledge Him at one time. I certainly am not in that category. I have not been given over to my sin. I have not murdered."

You can fill in the blank. I have not........

I come to chapter 2 and BAM!!! I realize the pride. Without Christ I am capable of everything Paul lists in chapter 1. I pass judgment on those doing these "wicked" things. Have I been angry? I've murdered. Have I been impatient? I've hated. I've thought I'm better than others. How wicked!

Then Paul asks the reader, "Or do you think lightly of the riches of His kindness and tolerance and patience, not knowing that the kindness of God leads you to repentance?"

It was God's kindness, compassion, and patience that drew me and yet, so often, I demand judgment on others.

Forgiveness is what is needed. For me.

The Spiritual Realm

2011-10-13T07:05:00.004-04:00

I woke up yesterday. The clock looked back at me. 4:50 a.m. The sounds of clanging in the kitchen were heard as my hubby prepared for his day.

I knew the alarm of my love's touch was supposed to awaken me at 5:30, so I tried to keep my eyes closed. I immediately started praying for certain situations in my life and those around me. I ventured somewhere between the conscious and subconscious. I continued praying and am not sure whether I was dreaming or awake when I became aware of a spiritual battle that encompassed me.

I found myself in a room praying with others. As I prayed I saw a woman coming around the corner of the doorway. I couldn't see all of her, only her hand was outstretched as if to say, "Nice to meet you." I went to place my hand in hers and found myself looking into the eyes of a witch. A grotesque, wrinkled hand with long nails took my hand in hers. She told me she wanted the soul of the one in which I was praying.

I immediately awoke, or at least opened my eyes. You must know, I am very leary of claiming to see visions and dream dreams. I don't believe God speaks this way much anymore. I think the Western Church has taken horrible liberties to push their own agenda in these matters, mostly for wealthy gain. But I do believe there is a spiritual battle ensuing around us. This could have been just a dream I had. To remind me of this battle. Whatever it was I was stirred. And shaken.

I do believe evil exists.

But I do believe God is stronger than any evil.

I awoke and went to my knees for the remainder of my quiet time and prayed. For all those in my life who find themselves in the middle of spiritual darkness. For those who may be involved in evil.

Ephesians 6:1-13 reminds us:
Finally, be strong in the Lord and in the strength of His might. Put on the full armor of God, so that you will be able to stand firm against the schemes of the devil. For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the ruler, against the powers, against the world forces of this darkness, against the spiritual forces of wickedness in the heavenly places.

Please stand in prayer with our family. We are fighting deep battles right now. We are fighting with the Most High Warrior. And we know He is the Victor!

Praise to His name.

A Poem of Prayer

2011-10-12T04:30:00.000-04:00

Can You Trust Me, Child?

Can you trust Me, child?
Not only for ultimate eternity,
of which you know next to nothing,
and so are not tempted to meddle-
But for the little span of you life between…
the Now and Then, where you envision
decline and separations and failures,
impairments, pain, bereavements, disappointments-
Do you find Me qualified to be Lord of your last days?
Oh-yes, Lord! YES, Lord! Yes and amen!

Can you trust Me, child?
Not only to synchronize the unthinkable
intricacies of creation-
But to work together for good the gravities
and tugs within your little orbit,
where your heart is pulled by needs
and lacks you wish, but are destitute, to fill-
Do you find My resources adequate
to feed both the sparrow and you?
Oh-yes, Lord! Yes, Lord! Yes and amen!

Can you trust Me, child?

Not only for the oversight of nations
and creations not of this world-
But for those beloved ones I committed
to you and you committed to Me-
Do you believe Me trustworthy to perform
the good work begun in them
until the Day of Jesus Christ?
Oh-yes, Lord! Yes, Lord! Yes and amen!

by Ann Blochir, written during her fight with cancer that eventually took her life.

Fun at the Corn Maze

2011-10-11T04:30:00.000-04:00

Last week our friends from Lakeland invited us to join them at a local corn maze.

"Inger" and her best bud, William had a great morning of playing together.

Sweet little Sopia.

A few of the gang enjoying a hay ride together.

On the way home, "Inger" had some ants in her pants...

this is her with her big sister's wig on.

Empty Thoughts. Empty Words

2011-10-10T08:37:00.000-04:00

I've had very few blog posts lately. I've been busy.

But the real truth is...I haven't been able to find the words to write about. Writer's block or just being plain tired. Not sure which.

One thing I do know is my spirit has felt dry. Life holds so many trials and disappointments. Family issues. Siblings struggling. Children floundering. Doubts in my own mind.

So again, I talk to myself. I say, "Self, you know the truth. You know the One who holds all things together. You know your God loves you and gives you these valleys to grow in, to depend on Him. Gather yourself. Talk to the One who has paid the price of redemption for you. He redeemed you from the pit. He has crowned you with lovingkindness and compassion. (Ps. 103) He will give you the eagles wings to soar on the heights of His love and grace."

Then I give myself a swift kick in the "cookie dough". (This is what the Ponderosa calls the gluteus maximus)

ZOOOOOMMMM!!!!

2011-10-07T07:20:00.000-04:00

Good morning, friends. Life has been busy and the blog has taken a backseat for a while. I'll be back.

Please know I am praying for all of you who are in the midst of a valley. And please keep praying for "Hoss". He is taking baby steps forward. He is settled back into life at Agape Ranch. Most of all, he needs a heart change. If only he knew the rest and joy he may find in Christ.

Talk to you soon.

Incredible...

2011-10-02T19:10:00.001-04:00

A Special Tea Party

2011-09-30T05:30:00.000-04:00

This week, Flower (who used to be Treasure and Ginger; this is the last change) had a special tea party with "Inger". He had a grand time.

He met a new friend, Black Beauty.

Hymn Study #4 Phillip Bliss

2011-09-29T04:56:00.000-04:00

This week's hymn study is on Phillip Bliss, the author of , Hallelujah! What a Savior.Phillip Bliss was a contemporary of Fanny Crosby and Ira Sankey. Before Sankey became a duo with D.L. Moody, Bliss was the one who helped Moody with the worship and singing at the evangelistic meetings. Bliss wrote many songs, of which a few are: Dare to be a Daniel, Jesus Loves Even Me, My Redeemer, and Wonderful Words of Life, just to name a few. He also, wrote the music for It is Well With My Soul.

Bliss was raised in a Godly home and doesn't remember a time that he did not know Jesus, but at the age of 12 made a public commitment of what was already in his heart. He was a man of great talent, but more than that, was a man who loved the Lord. He married and was the father of two children. At the age of 38 he and his wife were involved in a train wreck. He escaped, but realized his wife was still inside pinned in the flames. He went back in and stayed with her until they both were taken home to be with Jesus. When his luggage arrived at the destination many hymns were found and published.

God used Bliss in a way that helped to shape the history of Christianity in America.

Next time I sing of "The Man of Sorrows" or dance around with my chickadees singing Dare to be a Daniel, I will remember the life of a man who lived the talk and laid down his very life for his beloved.

Book Review - Fyodor Dostoevsky

2011-09-28T08:55:00.000-04:00

I was intrigued as I prepared to read Fyodor Dostoevsky by Peter Leithart. This book is another in the series, Christian Encounters.

As I delved into this little book, I realized I don't know much about Russian history or culture. Peter Leithart wrote this book in a dialogue style, which helped to make it a good read. Very interesting.

I had never heard of Dostoevsky before reading this book. He was a giant in the reformation of political Russia. He lived in the 1800's and his life was full of adventure, trial and death. After writing a book to typify the political situation of Russia, he was arrested and found himself in front of a firing squad. While third in line to face death, a decision was made to send the prisoners to exile in Siberia instead. During his stay, the New Testament was allowed to be read. This was his very breath and life during these years. Unfortunately, he suffered from epilepsy, but also was involved in extramarital affairs. This disappointed me as a reader.

Fyodor Dostoevsky has been hailed as having a deep Christian Faith, but I am not sure how deep those roots went. The many references to Christ in the book had to do with the state of Russia as a whole. In this read, Dostoevsky never talks about his personal relationship to Christ and what Christ's work on the cross did for him.

I learned many things reading this, but would have loved to read more about his faith, and less about his works.

As part of the Booksneeze blogging network, I received a complementary copy of this book.

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Letter H is For Horse

2011-09-28T05:30:00.000-04:00

I love teaching my children.

Happy 6th Birthday, Inger!

2011-09-27T05:37:00.000-04:00

Happy Birthday, our sweet little nature lover. You bring such joy to our home and lives. Everyday we thank God for the gift He has given us. You are such a beautiful little girl, with a precious heart for God's creation. Our prayer is that your heart will desire to know God, the Creator of all the things you love. He made you and loves you. Happy 6th Birthday.

Our New Addition

2011-09-26T12:32:00.000-04:00

Treasure was his name and soccer is his game. "Inger's" birthday is Tuesday and we celebrated with a frog party yesterday. Saturday we went to pick up the gift that "Little Joe" surprised her with. Thanks to our Lakeland friends for supplying him for us.

Ginger is his name now, but we are not sure of the gender of this cute little bird yet. He has so much personality. He plays with his toys all morning and seems to be carrying on a conversation with someone.

You will notice the trepidation in "Inger's" face as Ginger makes the walk up her arm.

A Heart For Freedom

2011-09-22T07:17:00.003-04:00

This was a book I had a hard time putting down. Chai Ling, the author of A Heart For Freedom documents her life and involvement in the Tienanmen Square movement.

I was 16 years old at the time of these happenings; half-way across the world. I was far from this incredible world disaster; both physically and mentally. I am about the same age at Chai Ling and am amazed at the strength she had to endure what she did.

Her writings in this book are clear and concise. As you read it you feel as if you are right there in the middle of the happenings. But this book is also a memoir of the horrific political and social unrest that continues in China. Chai Ling takes us through the most recent years of her life and the healing that had to take place due to the atrocities she endured.

The most exciting event that took place in Chai Ling's life is her salvation. After being raised in a typical Chinese home and embracing Buddhism, she arrived in America still full of emptiness and hurt. The Lord did some amazing things to bring her to Himself. Her story is one that will captivate you and inspire you to make a difference in the world around us.

Chai Ling, Thank you for sharing your incredible journey with us.

As a part of the Tyndale Blogger's Network, I received a free copy of this book.

Hymn Study #3 - Martin Luther

2011-09-21T08:20:00.002-04:00

This week at the Ponderosa, we are studying the life of Martin Luther as well as the hymn, A Mighty Fortress is Our God.

Martin Luther was a man of God whom God used in a mighty way to change the course of world history as well and the course of the church of Jesus Christ. Luther grew up in a home that practiced the Catholic faith and ended up at a monastery, but God was already working on opening his eyes to the fallacy and evils of the Roman Catholic church. He fought and fought hard, but finally ended up having to hide to save his life. God protected him and in the process, he wrote this hymn. I am thankful for his fight.

The last stanza is this hymn states:

"That word above all earthly powers,

no thanks to them, abideth;

the spirit and the gifts are ours,

thru him who with us sideth.

Let goods and kindred go,

this mortal life also;

the body they may kill;

God's truth abideth still;

his kingdom is forever.

Martin Luther had a firm faith (without works) in the Lord. He did not fear death. He trusted in the Sovereign Creator for his life and death.

Just For Fun!

2011-09-18T06:08:00.001-04:00

So Challenging....

2011-09-17T05:44:00.000-04:00

She continues to bring me to my knees asking our God to change me. Thank you, Nancy.

I Am Not My Husband's Mother

A Soft Answer

2011-09-16T10:43:00.000-04:00

This encouraged and challenged me so much.

A Soft Answer

It's Not That Easy

2011-09-12T08:52:00.004-04:00

The Puebla Ponderosa has just started week seven in Sabbath schooling this year. This means we are taking a break from normal school and doing some fun school; visits, field trip, etc.

This morning we were doing our worship around the breakfast table and have come to the 7th chapter of Acts. Stephen, a newly appointed deacon, is preaching to the religious crowd. He recounts the old testament seeing through the lens of God's mercy and judgment. He then pronounces the truth of where the religious leaders, chief priests and people stand.

Stiff-necked. Uncircumcised. Resisters of the Holy Spirit. Persecutors like your fathers.

Their response?

Grinding their teeth, stopping their ears, screaming; they rushed at him. Picking up stones they began stoning him.

His response as he was dying?

"Father, do not hold this against them."

This has cut to the core of my own heart. As I was relating this all to my children, my littlest one said, "Mommy, he should of asked them to 'Please, don't do that'."

I looked at her knowing she was relating information that we have used in conflict resolution. But deep down, I think she was cut to the quick too. She wanted them to stop.

God's story is amazing, for He used this to further the kingdom of His dear Son. She has a hard time grasping this, but I pray one day all my children's faith will be as strong.

One day, very soon, they may need to stand up in the same way.

Just a Few Minutes...or Pages With a Friend

2011-09-10T07:24:00.000-04:00

Whatever the circumstances you face right now, Stained Glass Hearts, by Patsy Clairmont will seem like a breath of fresh air. It's like sitting down to a warm cup of tea, wrapped in a homemade blanket and enjoying the company of your best friend, while you hear the winds of life howling outside.

Patsy Clairmont shares her heart with the reader; the struggles she has lived through and the saving grace of God that, though your pit seems deep, is much deeper.

She takes different aspects of beauty, from nature to art and develops a theme bringing us back to God's plan is good. That we can see beauty in ashes. We can experience peace when we give OUR plans to God. When we allow Him to steer our lives course.

Each chapter ends with tangible, hands on ideas to cement the thoughts and views of each chapter. To help us appreciate the beauty God has made through man, such as art, music, and video. But most of all God's Word that applies to each life's situation.

The reader will be brought to a new level of perspective as they read, Stained Glass Hearts.

I received a free copy of this book as part of the Booksneeze Blog Network.

Hymn Study #2- John Newton

2011-09-09T05:52:00.001-04:00

John Newton is a well known composer of hymns and best known for Amazing Grace. His story began in England where at a young age, his mother died. But not before she had told him about her amazing Lord.

He ended up as a nine year old serving on a ship and eventually being grabbed by Her Majesty's Navy to serve the Queen. This was not his first encounter on a ship. His father was a Captain on his own ship. But this was his first encounter with the Slave trade, which was his profession for many years.

Interestingly enough, it was the very slaves he sold, which nursed him back to health aboard a slave ship, as he was fighting for his very life. He was sick and there was no one to help him recover. They were the ones who brought him water and bread. This was a turning point in this life. He never viewed his "cargo" the same again. Soon afterward he ended up on the seas during a storm. This is where he met his Creator.

John Newton became and pastor at Olney in England. He never loved better. He was given a heart of flesh in place of his heart of stone and God used him in amazing ways.

Amazing Grace has to be the favorite hymn of non believers. It is amazing how often it is played to incite emotion rather than focus on the true message that John Newton wanted to be known.

The next time you sing this beloved hymn, let the words sink down deep into your soul.

We are wretches. Our Saviour took us out of the pit and redeemed us. Praise Him!

What is She Thinking?

2011-09-08T04:07:00.000-04:00

Today, I gave permission to my sweet youngest one to play her 30 minutes on the computer.

I found she had accessed this blog and found a you tube video of Agape Boarding School.

She then accessed their you tube channel.

And with her face 1 foot from the screen, her earbuds in her ears, and her face cupped in her hands, she was intensely watching all the videos from her Big Brother's School.

I wonder what she was thinking. I wonder if this "involvement" makes her feel closer to "Hoss".

I wonder how much she misses.

Her heart must be full of questions...

Fire, Water and Fear

2011-09-06T14:21:00.003-04:00

Sometimes in my life, there are 2 x 4 moments. (As in boards)

God confirms a truth that I need to grasp in my life and does it by various means.

Mr. Spurgeon has been feeding "Mr. Cartwright" and I each evening with God's Word. Lately we have been in Isaiah 43.

¹But now thus says the LORD, he who created you, O Jacob,
he who formed you, O Israel:
"Fear not, for I have redeemed you;
I have called you by name, you are mine.
² When you pass through the waters, I will be with you;
and through the rivers, they shall not overwhelm you;
when you walk through fire you shall not be burned,
and the flame shall not consume you.

I have felt engulfed by flames. I have felt without a shadow of a doubt that my head is below water. These things have I felt, but have really not known. For my God is able to sustain me. I must speak to my soul and say, "This is not truth."

Last week my dear friend, Patty, sent me a card that was full of encouragement and guess what? Yup. The verses on the inside of the card were the same.

So today, in the midst of being on my back for 3 days with a pulled muscle, my mind was struggling to fight. I was listening to a podcast from Revive our Hearts with Nancy Leigh DeMoss. She was interviewing Angie Smith, the wife of Todd Smith of the Christian group, Selah. A few years ago she delivered a baby that died. She has since written a book called, I Will Carry You. She explained her journey and how God was enough for her as she went through this extreme trial. She read Isaiah 43:1-3.

Right there, the tears began to flow. As I heard her say, " we do not see the depth of God's Word. We take for granted these specific promises He give us," I grabbed my head and held myself, crying.

For I know as my oldest lamb is far away, my God is near. My heart aches daily and I fight. My thoughts of the "what ifs" and "what will happen when the year comes up" pound my mind too often. Then I find myself wondering if my God is big enough. Anxiety. I fight.

He will send the fires and floods, but He will carry me through.

Did You Know?

2011-09-04T06:30:00.001-04:00

that small water spiders eat tadpoles that are 3 times their size?

Neither did we.

Foot over foot, the girls climbed the fence to the retention pond next to our home last night. They made the jump; ran helter-skelter in the tall grass and brought back a bucket of tadpoles. With no water. Once more, with "Little Joe's" help they scrambled back over to get water that would house these little creatures until they are adult frogs. We kept two tadpoles.

We woke up this morning and found one of the tadpoles in the jaws of a water spider that we happened to house as well. He must have come on over in the water.

Science happens.

My coffee table in the home school room is now home to a mason jar with an ant farm and a small pond with two tadpoles in it.

Science happens.

I am thankful for these moments.

The freedom to teach my precious children at home.

Hymn Study #1 - William Cowper

2011-09-01T12:32:00.006-04:00

Here at school on the Ponderosa, we are embarking on a weekly hymn study. This has been something I have yearned to do and just never made time for it in my schedule. This week was our first hymn.

"There is a Fountain Filled with Blood" was written by William Cowper. The hymn is one of great depth and yet, an all so familiar one, in which we can sing without even thinking about it.

William Cowper struggled with depression and mental anguish from the time of his mother's death at age 6 until the end of his life. He did not come into a saving knowledge of Jesus Christ until he was 33 years old. After his conversion, he lived with a Pastor and his wife. The pastor eventually died, and the widow was invited by Pastor John Newton to move to Olney, England to be part of the fellowship there. Cowper moved as well.

God in his providence introduced Newton to Cowper and Pastor Newton became very instrumental in the day to day goings-on of Cowper and his mental state. He struggled so often with assurance of salvation and depression still. And yet, amazingly, wrote some deep hymns of the faith, that have become landmarks for the Evangelical body of Christ.

He wrestling with doubt. He pushed through the thoughts. He conquered in Jesus' name.

So many times when we as believers go through the valleys that can cause of pain, we feel so alone. We forget those saints that walked before. We sing the hymns and then wonder if we will ever attain to the "sainthood" of the hymn writers. But they are just like us. Wandering sheep seeking the Good Shepherd. He hears our voice and rescues.

The New Doooo!

2011-08-31T04:26:00.000-04:00

My beautiful 12 year old.

You've come a long way, baby! I love you, "Marie".

Just a Few Extra Seconds....

2011-08-30T07:44:00.003-04:00

Today as "Inger" and I did school together, she arrived at at a new level of creativity. One that I have never had to make time for in my other students.

So I asked myself, "Do I make time for this?"

The artist has come alive, and, yes, it matters deeply to her that she is able to make her name look beautiful. Needless to say, I was pretty impressed that a five year old can make her letters let alone, dress them up.

This got me to thinking...how many times do I say no, but could say yes?

I'm afraid to say, too many. Most of the time the negative reply is given because it takes time. But what do these few seconds matter? I am showering love on her instead of worrying about my time table.

So saying "Yes" yesterday made one little girl very happy.

And saying yes, made one big mama content.

Date Night with Daddy!

2011-08-27T06:05:00.001-04:00

The perfect match: Ice cream and the pet store.

Pure joy for "Inger".

Book Review

2011-08-26T06:52:00.004-04:00

Biographies are probably my favorite types of books to read. I especially love reading how God has changed a life.

Brenda Warner has written her memoir, One Call Away. Most of us know who she is by her husband's "work" playing football, but her story is much greater than that.

Her life began in a average American family. She made a commitment as a young child to the Lord, but walked away for a time. This story is one of redemption and the amazing change God can make in a life. Her first marriage is one of abuse and pain. Her first baby ends up blind due to the life she is living. Trial after trial meet her and the Lord helps her through. Kurt comes into her life after her second child is born. He is an unbeliever at the time, but soon comes to know Jesus. His life is radically changed.

Whatever the trials you, as the reader, have gone through, this story is one you will relate to. You will find yourself laughing, crying and wondering. There are so many facets to her life journey. This is a story of perseverance and faith. Those who know the Lord Jesus have peace in the same way. There is pain in life, but peace and contentment through our Savior.

As part of the Booksneeze blogging network, I received a free copy of this book.

My 8th Grader

2011-08-25T05:00:00.001-04:00

The Law Fulfilled

2011-08-24T07:42:00.002-04:00

Leviticus.

Most people who are unchurched have no idea this book in the Bible exists. I have just started my journey through this book. It is heavy and yes, even at times, boring. As I am reading about all of the step by step instructions in sacrifice I feel very burdened for the children of Israel during those years. There was so much to know and remember.

And it struck me.

Jesus fulfilled all the Law in one sweep. His blood was the last sacrifice, even more, the only sacrifice that fully answered God's wrath against sinful man.

This makes me thankful. I am not bound by the law, but it is the law that brings man to repentance. My sin is my burden, but I have a Savior who lifts this burden from me as I confess verbally and inwardly desire change.

Praise our Lamb for bearing this cruelness of the cross for us. Praise Him for His grace.

A Little Ranting

2011-08-21T18:03:00.003-04:00

Does anyone out there know what it is like to have a child in rebellion? (O.K. I know you're out there, but I wish you were here at the Ponderosa.)

Out of the home? Spouting anger to you that you even adopted him in the first place.

This journey has been very lonely. (O.K. I know my eyes are completely inverted and selfish at this point.)

But, nonetheless, lonely. The ache is so deep. The fight is waning.

So I go to my Father. I cry (scream), Why? I ask (plead) for Him to move now. I cry so hard I can't breathe. My eyes are swollen. My heart is in pieces. My lover holds me. I just want to be alone.

Today, in worship, I am reminded how much my Father loves me. I am reminded He gave His only unique Son to save a wretch like me. (and "Hoss") I was His enemy. He made me His child.

He is the Healer of the Soul. He replaces our sin with His Son's righteousness.

Thank you, Father.

And I cry some more.

For "Hoss"

2011-08-20T06:56:00.000-04:00

Our prayer for our dear "Hoss".

Are You Hanging On?

2011-08-19T05:33:00.001-04:00

Too many mornings are like this:

Get up-check

Take shower-check

Prepare coffee-check

Hair, makeup-check

Bible study-check

Prayer-check

Wake kiddos-check

etc.

So as I was checking off my mental list this morning, doing the Bible Study part, I was knocked over the head by two by four.

Luke 19: 47-48 "Every day he was teaching at the temple. But the chief priests, the teachers of the law and the leaders among the people were trying to kill him. Yet they could not find any way to do it, because all the people hung on his words.

As I read this, I mentally pictured a person holding on to the end of a rope dangling over a deep canyon.

Do I hang on to every word of my Savior as if it is the only source of life?

Do I crave the Word as the Bread that is life and nourishment?

Do I "do devotions" with an attitude of obligation?

Life is the canyon. The Word made flesh is the rope. Me...well, that's me. And I aim to beg the Spirit for the strength to keep hanging on.

No Ears

2011-08-18T08:01:00.002-04:00

Mark 16:15 "And He said to them, 'Go into all the world and preach the Gospel to every creature.'"

This is our new memory verse for the week. Each morning we read Scripture and go over all of our memory work. We are using this memory system. In a month's time we review all Scriptures we have memorized. It is a great tool.

My littlest one didn't quite understand our verse.

"Inger":

"But, Mommy, creatures can't understand and talk!"

As I explained to her what creatures meant, I was reminded of the verse that exhorts us to praise God and speak forth His Word, and when we don't, even the rocks and creation will cry out.

That even flabbergasted her more.

Open our mouths, Lord.

Listening Big

2011-08-16T02:47:00.006-04:00

Each morning my treasures and I have Bible around our kitchen table. We are reading through the book of John. We each take a verse and we read through one chapter a day. Each person, then, explains a verse that they took notice of, or an attribute of God. Today was no different.

John 10

"Mrs. Cartwright":

"John 10:28 reminds us that once we are God's sheep, nothing can change that. 'and I give eternal life to them, and they will never perish; and no one will snatch them out of My hand.' Nothing can take us out of the fold...but we must be part of the true fold to begin with. Does this mean we can live any way we want to and hold to this promise. NO! We must always be examining our lives to see if our fruit is in line with true conversion. Our hearts desires must be to relinquish all sin and strive for holiness. We will continue to sin until we are in heaven, but are we relying on Christ and wanting to please him?"

Then I reminded them of the interview of Tullian Tchividjian (part 1 and part 2) that we listened to on Sunday. He prayed a prayer at 6 years old, but wasn't saved until he was 21. Saying a prayer doesn't save you, trusting in Christ and bearing fruit is evidence of a change.

"Little Joe":

"Jesus says I am the Good Shepherd."

"Marie":

"The religious leaders wanted to kill Jesus, but it wasn't His time yet."

"Inger":

"Mommy, can I say something?" (Usually she has a hard time paying attention to the hard words, but today was something different.)"It was wintertime, Mommy."

I looked at her and wondered where in the world she got that from. Lo, and behold, there it was staring me in the face. John 10:23, "It was winter...." (Although, she is my nature lover...that word must have jumped out at her.)

Just a reminder to me of the little details that matter. One day, my prayer is that these little lambs will have a strong desire to inductively study the Word of God. One little fact that mattered to place the context of this passage.

Jesus, bend my lambs' hearts to you.

Agape Boarding School Blog: 2011 Rodeo #2 Chute Dogging

2011-08-15T08:09:00.000-04:00

Agape Boarding School Blog: 2011 Rodeo #2 Chute Dogging

"Hoss" is the first one out....

Book Review

2011-08-13T17:27:00.000-04:00

Adoption is part of our story, so when I saw the book, Love you More, by Jennifer Grant, available for a blog review, I jumped on it. For who doesn't like a heart warming story?

Love You More is part story, part explanation of the adoption experience. As I read it, I needed to remember this is one woman's journey, not every one's. Although, there were many similarities in our experience as well. There were many times she referred to those bizarre questions one is asked, especially when there is an interracial adoption, and help the reader to know what to say regarding infertility, parenting and adoption. Sometimes the person with the most sincere heart can say the most insensitive things. That she addressed this, I am grateful.

The journey of the adoption of Mia into their home is a beautiful picture of the artistry of adoption. Yet, Jennifer was real with her struggles in the process as well. It wasn't all rosy all the time. She delved into interracial adoption and racism that remains alive and well. Yes, we are far from the times of slavery and yet, because of sin, prejudice remains.

My only negative about this book is the lack of spiritual discernment. There were many references to other religions (Buddhism, Jewish mysticism, etc.) being o.k. to embrace. There was even a quote from her acquaintance that stated abortion is a right. This disappointed me. Mostly that Thomas Nelson published it.

Jesus made all the difference in my adoption experience. If it weren't for Him then or now, I wouldn't have made it.

Tears and Faith

2011-08-11T08:17:00.003-04:00

Last night, the feelings of hopelessness for "Hoss" returned. Tears that wouldn't stop. Thoughts that ran in circles.

This morning His mercies are new.

Luke 11:8 reminds me that I must not give up. I must keep knocking. I must believe. Persistence in trusting. But it even goes beyond trusting. I must keep asking believing in the ability of the Almighty Creator to transform a heart. This is His specialty.

Trust. Faith. Believe. Endure. Love.

From afar.

Unworthy

2011-08-10T02:59:00.000-04:00

(Luke 71-10)

Jesus has entered Capernaum. The crowds continue to follow him. Sadly, they are following for their own needs to be met, as well as just seeing Him as a prophet.

The crowd seems to be a mixed group of people. There are always those who have sincere faith who really desire to know this Jesus.

²Now a centurion had a servant who was sick and at the point of death, who was highly valued by him.³When the centurion heard about Jesus, he sent to him elders of the Jews, asking him to come and heal his servant.

Notice the religious leaders request of Jesus.

⁴And when they came to Jesus, they pleaded with him earnestly, saying, "He is worthy to have you do this for him, ⁵for he loves our nation, and he is the one who built us our synagogue."

Notice the centurion's response.

⁶And Jesus went with them. When he was not far from the house, the centurion sent friends, saying to him, "Lord, do not trouble yourself, for I am not worthy to have you come under my roof. ⁷Therefore I did not presume to come to you. But say the word, and let my servant be healed.⁸For I too am a man set under authority, with soldiers under me: and I say to one, 'Go,' and he goes; and to another, 'Come,' and he comes; and to my servant, 'Do this,' and he does it." ⁹When Jesus heard these things, he marveled at him, and turning to the crowd that followed him, said, "I tell you, not even in Israel have I found such faith." ¹⁰And when those who had been sent returned to the house, they found the servant well.

There was an extreme change in response. I suspect the first request was from hearts of the religious leaders. They were always concerned for the outward; wanting to "look good"; making note of what people did instead of their motives.

Jesus is always concerned with the heart. So many times he reprimanded the religious leaders for this.

My heart? I know the truth of Jeremiah 17:9. My heart is deceitful and desperately wicked...I don't even know the measure of this. But my Jesus knows. I pray for his mercies every day.

Jesus saw the Centurion's true faith, and rewarded it.

Are you worthy or unworthy?

Quote of the Day

2011-08-09T07:54:00.003-04:00

I am reading through Elyse Fitzpatrick's new book, Give Them Grace - Dazzling Your Kids with the Love of Jesus. An amazing read.

"Because both parents and children obstinately refuse to pull the cart of God's glory down the road, the Father broke the stick of punishment on his obedient Son's back. Rather than trying to entice us by dangling an unattainable carrot of perfect welcome and forgiveness incessantly in front of our faces, God the Father freely feeds the carrot to us, his enemies. He simply moves outside all our categories for reward and punishment, for human motivation, and gives us all the reward and takes upon Himself all the punishment. He lavishes grace upon grace on us and bears in his own person all the wrath we deserve. Then he tells us, in light of all that he's done, 'Obey'." pg.108

All I can say is I'm prostrate before the Lord thanking Him profusely.

And asking Him to help me to parent my treasures to His glory.

Fun with Numbers

2011-08-05T16:00:00.004-04:00

This week we started school. Last minute I completely changed curriculum for my youngest. So glad I did. We are using My Father's World and loving it. The beauty of this curriculum is there is little book work, lots of learning the fun way.

This week we studies the days of Creation. Here is the book she made.

One Itsy-Bitsy Request

2011-08-04T04:31:00.000-04:00

"Inger": "Mommy, next time you get gum can you buy cold gum?"

"Mommy": "What do you mean by cold gum?"

"Inger": "You know, not hot gum." (She means minty)

I'm really enjoying these years with my littlest.

The Ultimate Sunrise

2011-08-03T10:58:00.004-04:00

The book of Luke opens up in such a way that makes me fall to my knees. Yes, we all know that this is the record of the birth of Jesus, but reading the account of Zachariah and Elizabeth as well as Mary's visit is amazing.

Scripture records both Mary and Zachariah were "filled with the Spirit" and then prophesied in form of a song.

Zachariah uses an interesting name of God in his prayer full of praise.

Luke 1:76-79

And you, child, will be called the prophet of the Most High;
for you will go before the Lord to prepare his ways,
to give knowledge of salvation to his people
in the forgiveness of their sins,
because of the tender mercy of our God,
whereby the Sunrise shall visit us from on high
to give light to those who sit in darkness and in the shadow of death,
to guide our feet into the way of peace."

When I think of a sunrise, beauty immediately comes to mind. But then I also think to the darkness(at least on the part of the earth that I live) at night. Pitch black. Once the sun comes up, all darkness is dispelled.

No darkness can remain. The light overshadows the darkness. All the time.

My Lord is that Sunrise. He dispells all darkness...even in the valley of the shadow of death. He guides my feet. He brings peace when all else is chaos.

Malachi 4:2 also refers to Jesus as light, "But for you who fear my name, the sun of righteousness shall rise with healing in its wings. You shall go out leaping like calves from the stall."

At times there seems to be darkness all around me. I turn to the Light that guides my way.

The Life Cycle...Through the Eyes of a 5 Year Old

2011-08-02T03:51:00.001-04:00

Yesterday, the last day of summer before school started, my girls and I were having our daily "book fix".

They each bring a pile of library books to my bed and we enjoy reading together. As their heads rest on my shoulders, I pause to muse that this will not last forever.

There is usually a vast difference in the subject matter of the books.

Insects, bugs, anything animalia. ("Inger's choice)

Books with beautiful pictures whether true or fiction. ("Marie's" choice)

My little "Inger" is my animal lover. As we stopped to read a book about vesperids (snakes with poison and pits) we found out they eat frogs. "Inger" stopped me and informed me that is good because frogs eat butterflies. And we DON'T want butterflies eaten. Little did she know she was reporting on the life cycle of the insect world.

"Marie" endures and waits eagerly for her next pick.

Courageous

2011-08-01T05:52:00.000-04:00

Inspiring, convicting and culture-defying. These words describe the book I have just finished reading.

Courageous, written by Randy Alcorn, has far surpassed my expectations. This story follows four police officers and one friend as they attempt to balance job, family and God. As our culture has screamed out to men that it is o.k. to be passive and selfish, Courageous screams out, "Men, you must fight what you feel and step up to be the shepherds of your household."

This book is one that makes you feel that you are a part of the story. It weaves in culturally relevant teen issues. Randy has done a good job of showing that nothing apart from Christ will bring satisfaction, including a job that has its thrills. Jesus Christ is shown as the Supreme healer and also, Lord. The only and One Lord.

For those who have seen Fireproof, The Movie, you will be glad to know that Caleb and Katherine Holt are a part of this feature as well. After reading this book, I will be definitely finding time to view the movie.

Another great novel by Randy Alcorn.

I received a free book as part of the Tyndale Blogging Network.

Chocolate Comes in All Colors

2011-07-31T04:14:00.001-04:00

My oldest daughter, "Marie", asked me this week if "Hoss" is mad at her. I am so sad to think she even ponders this.

As I explained where his anger is aimed, our conversation meandered over to her own adoption. The questions came quickly.

"Did my birth mom love me?" "Could she really not take care of me?" "Do I have other brothers and sisters?" "Did she know Jesus?"

So, for the first time I told how her BM was trying to find peace in all the wrong things: alcohol, drugs, etc. She told me that scared her.

But then I was able to bring her around to how grateful I am that Jesus handpicked her for our own. How she wouldn't have heard about Jesus. Providentially, we are reading, Dori, A Girl Nobody Loved. I was able to remind her of this and how her life could have been so different. She pondered. She was trusting.

We talked about the different shades of color that our family represented. She wanted to know what colors each of the birth parents were for her family.

Together we came up with this list:

"Hoss" and "Marie": milk chocolate

"Little Joe": Dark Chocolate

"Inger": Dark Chocolate with nuts (gotta love it)

Daddy: Chocolate swirled with caramel

She looked me straight in the face and said, "You are white chocolate, Mommy."

And this I am proud to be.

Unanswered Questions????

2011-07-30T07:01:00.001-04:00

You ask me, "Why?"

I don't have an answer that will fill your anxious heart.

You tell me, "I want to know. I want to know now."

I say, "You won't believe me."

I say, "You must trust me as your mom."

"Hoss" continues to hurt and be full of anger at the unknown, unanswered questions.

I continue to hurt and question whether the first 11 years of his life mattered.

Deep down inside I know the truth. The battle remains. Can't we fast-forward 4 years? Wouldn't that make things easier? I have questions, too, son.

But I turn to the One who holds all the answers to life. I trust.

My Sweet Sister

2011-07-29T05:07:00.000-04:00

My Darling sister turns 40 today.

I so wish I could be up in Tennessee together. This year does not allow for it, sadly.

So, while I am sitting here in Florida, I am loving you from afar, Jen. You are such an inspiration to me. You are such a great mom to your three beautiful boys. And a wonderful wife to your hubby. I am thinking of you often and praying for your continued growth in our Lord Jesus.

I have such wonderful memories of life growing up with you. And just last week I was reading through some old cards and came across quite a few from you during my time of infertility. Your heart for Jesus jumped off the pages and continues to prove evident in your life. Thank you for loving me and being my sister.

Happy 40th!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

The Natural Hair Repair

2011-07-28T10:37:00.002-04:00

A couple of months ago, I put twists in my daughter's hair. They were so easy to upkeep and maintain. But as I went to remove them yesterday, we had a loud screaming session.

I could not, I repeat, COULD NOT get the knots out.

For those of you blogging friends who have adopted children that are African American, I have stumbled across a natural remedy that is incredible.

1 Tbsp of Apple Cider Vinegar to 1 cup of water.

This is an amazing remedy for those tearful hair combing sessions.

Thanks to this blog along with this information I have found something easy to use.

So as we finished up my littlest hair today, I held her and we both cried. Cheezy. I know, but when you have to go through feeling like you are killing your child for hours...this is no exaggeration...this is such a gift.

I plan on using it myself.

The Peanut Man

2011-07-26T18:23:00.002-04:00

I love history and I love reading about people in history.

George Washington Carver, written by John Perry is an easy yet very interesting read into the life of an African American during the late 1800's and early 1900's.

Carver was a orphan from birth raised by a loving white family. This was unheard of in those days, but the family was loyal to him.

From the time he was little, Carver had a love for God's creation and throughout his life, asked God to help him learn how to use the creation to glorify the Creator.

God answered this and George Washington Carver became an inventor by American standards, but he saw it as a special gift bestowed on him by his Creator.

The book also delves into the life of Brooker T. Washington as he hired Carver to be part of the Science department at Tuskegee Institute. There were definite personality differences between the two men, but they continued to work together for many years.

Carver has been used by the Creator to introduce us to many uses for the sweet potatoes, peanuts and many other things. Many items we use today we can attribute to this man. May we realize that they are "blessings" from our Creator, as he did.

I was given a copy of this book as part of the blogging network by Thomas Nelson.

Wings like Eagles

2011-07-25T08:20:00.006-04:00

As I continue my journey in the study of the book of Exodus one phrase leaped out at me.

Chapter 19:3-6

Then Moses went up to God, and the LORD called to him from the mountain and said, “This is what you are to say to the descendants of Jacob and what you are to tell the people of Israel: ‘You yourselves have seen what I did to Egypt, and how I carried you on eagles’ wings and brought you to myself. Now if you obey me fully and keep my covenant, then out of all nations you will be my treasured possession. Although the whole earth is mine, you will be for me a kingdom of priests and a holy nation.’ These are the words you are to speak to the Israelites.”

God, the Creator and Sustainer of life, carries His children on eagles' wings!

The way our Lord has made eagles' wings is an amazing picture of aerodynamics. Because of the size and structure of its wings, the ability to soar is remarkable.

This is Effortless flight.

And this is what our Great God promises us in Isaiah 40:31.

Yet those who wait for the LORD Will gain new strength; They will mount up with wings like eagles, They will run and not get tired, They will walk and not become weary.

I cannot fly with out Him giving me strength. I cannot mount up with wings without Him giving me the ability. I will run and get tired and I will walk and become weary when I do it on my own. He must grant me these wings. He will see me through the turbulence of the storms and clouds of life. I can soar with ease when He is near.

So, Lord, I draw near. I ask you for these wings. I ask you for this strength.